Dear Suburban Working Moms: I know you’re out there! I’ve seen you hurriedly dropping your kids off at daycare (I’m the one in the sweats and sneakers…nice heels, by the way). I see you frantically cramming groceries into your cart with your kids hanging on your nice blazer (seriously, nice heels, where’d you get them?). How you must hate me while I quietly go about my shopping with nary a care about wayward sugar cereals making their way into my purchases. How you must look down upon my own uniform of track pants and t-shirts.
But you see, in many ways, I am just like you! I’m the Work at Home Mom, and I’m not feeling the love. I’ve been trying since Wee ‘Burb was 3 months old to get into your circle somehow. I’ve signed up for Mommy and Me classes, tried fruitlessly to find later hour storytimes. I’ve scanned the paper for fun weekend things to do with babies under 1 and NOTHING! Yes, I know they’re little blobs with no attention spans, but how else does a mommy find new friends?
What I do get is constant ads for story hours that last from 10-11 a.m., calls apologizing that once again my Mommy and Me class has been dropped from 5-6 p.m., but hey, do you want to join the one from 1-2 on Wednesdays? Despite what you, and frankly some days my husband thinks, I work! I truly do. Yes, it’s in my jammies, and yes it’s a flexible lifestyle I know many moms would kill for, but I work pretty damn hard and I miss my kid as much as the next mom. In addition to the standard working mom guilt (I suck as a mom, I suck as a worker, my brain is fried, if I read one more children’s book I will hurl, if I read one more sales “messaging” piece that has the words “customer-centric” in it, I will hurl), I’m also filled with insane guilt every time I throw a load of laundry in before a conference call. And yet even worse guilt when I don’t.
Every mommyblog will tell you, it’s lonely out there! My single friends live in cooler places, my married friends with kids have married siblings with kids, or married friends with kids that live closer. So I’m looking for you, fellow working moms! Are you all gathering somewhere I don’t know about? Is that why my classes are constantly getting cancelled? Is that why my only options to bond with my kid and meet other people is going to a park? Cuz I tried that and apparently nobody else thinks it’s the greatest idea to stick a 6-month old in the swings. Plus, frankly, you all scare me! Do you think I’m a stay-at-home mom slumming it with you working folks to take a break from my playdates?
Wee ‘Burb and I are planning our swim classes starting in this week at 5:30 p.m. That’s evening time, mommies! After work, even for those of you with real jobs (seriously, wear your heels, I want the details!). Please don’t let me get another call saying it’s cancelled. And when I’m there, do your level best not to judge me for my bedhead and sneakers…the truth is, I clean up okay (I know a great place to get discount shoes, just ask me)! And I work just as hard as you even if I do go to work every day 50 feet from my bed.
Love,
Suburban Work at Home Mom with the Same Guilt as You!
3 comments:
aw! I hope to be a working at home mommy some day too. I'm sure its tough to try to figure out the balance when both your job, mommy job, wife job, etc etc all take place in the same location!
Certainly working at home is the ideal. My daughter works outside the home and it was difficult for me to accept. My answer was to move near her and care for my granddaughter. I am hoping that we will see more of this as times and finances get tougher.
Certainly working at home is the ideal. My daughter works outside the home and it was difficult for me to accept. My answer was to move near her and care for my granddaughter. I am hoping that we will see more of this as times and finances get tough.
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