Wednesday, February 2, 2011


Long-time readers know Lola, she has guest posted for me a few times. 

Lola, as you may know, does not really live in suburbia. And yet seems to have run-ins with wildlife that are weirder than in actual suburbia. This one takes place on her DOORSTEP! Like her actual apartment doorstep.
Our e-mail conversation went like this:
Lola: I think I have a bat by my door.

Stephanie: What? Really??

Lola: Yes! I thought it was a dead mouse at first, but upon closer inspection, it's got leathery appendages. I think it's hiding from the cold.

Stephanie: Which door?!

Lola: That would be my apartment door. Well, it's in the corner BY the door. In the hallway. So it's not really in my apartment, just kind of hanging out in the hall...I hope it doesn't get vacuumed up by the caretaker!

Stephanie: Duuude, that's scary!!

Lola: Why? I wonder what it all bats eat fruit?

Stephanie: No just fruit bats. Now I feel kind of sad for the poor disease-ridden thing!

Lola: I know!! How will it get out? Of course I don't want to toss it out in this weather. I'll just leave it there and maybe it'll fly off...

Stephanie: But then it and give some old bird a heart attack [by this I mean old lady...Lola lives in a condo building crammed with old ladies]

Lola: Well, what do you want me to do?!

Stephanie: Hide! Run! Call for help! Just don't get rabies!

Lola: [ignoring my rabies comment totally] I just wonder how the hell it got in! Probably through the attic.

Stephanie: It defies nature. Pls take a pic for the blog

Lola: What if the flash upsets it and gets tangled up in my hair? Who'll be taking THAT picture?!

Stephanie: The coroner?

Lola: Hee, exactly. I'm not sure I'm ready to sacrifice myself for the sake of your blog.

Stephanie: Some friend you are!

Lola: Hey, I showed you my turkey! That sounded odd...

Stephanie: Now that I may use in my blog.

An hour later I get this from Lola:

Risking my life, I took a daring snippet of the dang bat. So please meet Bella, the batty bat. It's not very sharp but trust me, it's a fuzzy bat sleeping on its folded wings.

Happy dreams!

Postscript: Lola finally did call the caretaker. He called her back and told her there was nothing there and made it sounds like she should perchance upgrade her meds. She knows she wasn't crazy because a) she has this picture and b) her neighbor called and left her a voice mail saying she had something by her door...although, he IS an alchy.


MsBabyPlan said...

OMG, I am scared!!!

Mommy Lisa said...

Ewww. Right out the door! What if she had stepped on it!

Amanda said...

That's completely terrifying. I'm afraid of flying things -- birds, bats, etc. She's very brave :)

Kristen said...

aw, it's cute! Glad it's at her door and not mine though! lol

Joey @ Big Teeth and Clouds said...

That could be a wayward toupee. I believe her, I do. I'm just saying.

Anonymous said...

Wildlife in the wrong place always concerns me more than a little bit. But I have to say, I'm a fan of bats because they eat the bugs that I despise. It's definitely one of those, "the enemy of my enemy is my friend" situations. Bats and I? Freaking BFFFF.

Stephanie in Suburbia said...

I'm in agreement with the general dread of flying things. Flying things out of context are far more alarming to me.