Friday, August 26, 2011

Top 5 Seriously Random Closet Finds

So, Ryan over at The Woven Moments is the only person who responded to my post about period polish saying she would TOTALLY wear something with Menstruation in the title on her fingertips. Is it weird I liked her more after that? I relate to most of her posts, but this post about the terrible twos starting much earlier had me nodding the whole time. Go check her out for some TRUTH.
I was recently (inexplicably) motivated to clean out my toddler’s closet.

Wait, wait. Before you roll your eyes and wonder why the hell Steph let me guest post, let me explain.

Before my daughter (blog name Pumpkin) was born, this room was an office-slash-guest bedroom-slash-place-to-throw-stuff-where-no one-would-see-it.

You’ve got one of those, right?

When Pumpkin was born we transformed the room into a nursery. The room got painted, furnished, and decorated. The closet got ignored.

And now, almost two years later, that closet was calling to me. Beckoning me. I spent hours going through boxes, bags, and piles.

And now I give you, my top 5 favorite random closet finds.


#5. CD BINDER SHEETS

WTH?????














We made the digital music switch about five years ago. But in this closet, I found enough CDs, CD binders (remember 3-ring binders? Yeah, me neither.), and CD binder sheets to make 19-year-old-me cackle in Eve-6-and-Third-Eye-Blind delight.

I wracked my brain for a new use for these CD binder sheets. Ironic coasters? Waterproof toddler mattress pad?

Destination: Donate Pile. May they make some archaic music lover very happy.


#4. EMPTY DAY PLANNERS AND JOURNALS

Think of the tasks left undone! The appointments never scheduled! Tragic, really.















This is a perfect example of doing the same thing over and over and expecting a different result. My darling husband (B) is a brilliant problem-solver type who struggles with organization. And writing things down. And remembering to do things because he hasn’t written them down.

So here I come, Miss I-Can-Totally-Fix-You-By-Teaching-You-To-Be-More-Like-Me, and buy him a day-planner. Which he promptly throws away when I’m not looking loses.

So I buy him another.

And another.

Changing tactics, I bought him a journal. So he could write about his FEEEEELINGS about being disorganized. (I realize I need help.)

Eventually, I decided to stop badgering him and just accept the lack of organization. He has a whole room in the house that he can trash enjoy. It has doors that close and lock when anyone (ANYONE) comes over.

So it’s no surprise that I found the unused day planners when I cleaned out the closet. They are about as useful to my husband as the CD binder sheets are to me.

Destination: Trash Pile (outdated planners) and Donate Pile (sad, empty journal)


#3. AN OLD LOVE LETTER

Oh! The cheesiness of young love!





















Most love letters are, well, LETTERS. Leave it to me to create a handmade valentine, complete with glitter.

Shut up. I was an elementary school teacher. I was 22. I was in love.

Destination: Memory Box. Because my kids will definitely want to make fun of me for this someday. And let’s be honest, I deserve it.

#2. TOBACCOLESS CIGARETTES

Box of Illegal-Smelling Awesomeness

























Remember smoking? I do. Fondly.

When I first quit smoking, I faced a seriously uphill battle of cravings for nicotine. The gum never appealed to me; I wanted to smoke. A friend recommended the nicotine-free cigarettes.

I immediately ordered a carton.

The problem? Well, when you pull a big bright green box out of your pocket that has the words “Ecstacy” written on it, you tend to get some questions.

But the sideways glances really start when you light up and everything starts to smell like pot.

I found no fewer than six packs of these babies in the closet that day. Sigh.

Destination: Trash Pile but only after seriously considering smoking one out back, then reconsidering because I live next door to a cop.


#1. MY HUSBAND, THE (NEARLY) FAMOUS ACTOR

Hands down the best part of cleaning out this closet was finding the old pictures. And with that, I introduce you to my husband, B. The Scottish stone mason.

I'm completely overwhelmed by caption possibilities here.

























I wish I could have a caption contest for this picture. My entries would be:

“I take my re-enactments very seriously.”


“Stop pretending you don’t love these bloomers.”


“This is me sniffing the air of my own awesomeness.”

The truth of this picture is pretty great. B was an extra in HBO’s Emmy- and Golden Globe-winning mini-series, John Adams. It was filmed near our home in 2007.

B got to rub elbows with Laura Linney (swoon) and even got to be in a scene with Paul Giamatti. You can view that scene here…but you totally can’t see can baaaaarrrrreeeeely see B.

Destination: Memory Box. Because we are still waiting for HBO to send B his little gold statue. Any day now....

This is Stephanie and I am totally initiating a Caption Contest. I don't know what the prize will be, but I really am dying to see what people write.

10 comments:

Life As Wife said...

I am dying right now haha! My husband loves the John Adams mini series, how cool that B was in it!

"High-ho silver and awwaayyy!"

The Woven Moments said...

Thanks for the guest spot, Steph!

And fyi - I still think "PMS Primrose" or "Crampy Crimson" are going to be THE colors for fall.

Mads said...

haha this was hilarious! I can't wait for the closet gem pot giveaway on your blog ;)

Aleta said...

I had tried to leave a comment but it wouldn't let me :(

Only the very, very brave would dare to open my closet and only if fully armed.

Rach (DonutsMama) said...

We did the same thing when we converted our "everything" room into a nursery. We even pulled out vinyl records! Goodwill either totally loved us or hated us that day!

Hopes@Staying Afloat! said...

I love this post!!

What is currently the babies nursery used to be the catch all for everything "Where do you want to put this? I don't know...just through it in the...." It took several days to clean it out to make it nursery worthy! But the closet, well that wasn't exactly tackled because we were having our third boy, and really, how many boys onsies do you hang up?

This has inspired me to go clean out his closet....some day!

Kat said...

Currently our office is absolutely FILLED with Marcus' things. I'm 100% positive that when I start going through there in the next few weeks there are going to be some real treasures.

But CD storage sheets? How 2002 of you. I was trying so hard to think of what you could possibly DIY with those, but the best I could do was a poncho. No go.

Brittany said...

LOVE this picture of B. I watched the clip but couldn't find him...hint please :)

Hmmm - the caption possibilities are endless, but all I can come up with at the moment is:

"These Yanks and their tights...don't they know that real men are built for kilts?"

Linda said...

Too funny! Thanks for sharing.

Kristen said...

Caption: They told me to have an air of regalness -would that be nose up and to the right or is it left?

Nice closet finds. I should have done that when we moved.....